Recently, for 7 days I went through some very debilitating pain and there was no physical reasoning that I should have been in so much pain so then , I figured out it was a spiritual message.
First let me tell you what I went through and we will get to the message for the church body in a little bit.
It started out where I could not catch a deep breath without there being a massive sharp pain in my rib cage/ lungs area. As the days went on ,every breath I breathed turned into stabbing pains and I felt that every time I breathed. Every move I made now caused the pain, I couldn’t sleep at nights, and I was working 11 hour days this week and I couldn’t go to the Dr because i was needed at work. I asked off but I didn’t get it. The next day amongst all this pain I now couldn’t bend down to get dressed or pick up anything. I started taking Advil to see if that would help and it didn’t even touch the pain.
By now I am in total extreme pain and wondering if I should go to the ER ; I’m up nights anyways! I was always in pain, all day ; all night; it never went away; it was always there. No matter what I did, no matter how I laid down ; sat up, walked, it even hurt to talk. Then I started a cough amongst all this, which did not help.
As I lay in bed one night; only on my right side because I couldn’t lay any other way : warm tears started to fall down my face and they just came out . I wasn’t sad ,I made note of that , but I figure my body was just in so much pain. They just ran down my checks onto my pillow.
I got up and went on fb and sent a handful of messages to different people and felt happy knowing some people were going to pray for me when they woke up and checked their messages.
Thursday night I had a worsening pain in my left side; felt like a tight pressure restricting my breathing even more. So, along with the stabbing feeling and hard to breath; I now had this tight pressure to handle
Friday morning I had off work and I said ” God if you want me to go to the Dr. you will have to find the appointment and I will go.” I got in less than half a minute.
The Dr. was worried and wondered if it was a collapsed lung, a blood clot, or pneumonia. He sent me for x-rays STAT. He put me on Tylenol with Codeine and I left.
As I waited for the results; I thought, ” Finally, I will find out what is wrong with me and I can educate myself on what is going on and fix it”.
The nurse called me and said the x-ray was normal. I hung up the phone in disbelief. “If there is nothing wrong with me than why the heck am I going through this horrible pain GOD!”. I lost it for a second.
Tears started to build in behind my eyes but unlike before, these were tears of anger and frustration. Now, I couldn’t even educate myself to help myself, I only had God to depend on and I would not be able to contribute to the outcome of this venture. I had a “talking to” with God. More like a tantrum but okay ; call it what you will.:)
As I started this medication; I started having massive massive stomach cramps, numb fingers, nausea, I had some trouble urinating and it caused constipation. That first night with this medication was worse because I had the pain symptoms from prior and now all these on top of those! I lay in silence and stillness as I felt every bit of it. I knew I had to go back to the Dr.
On Saturday morning I went back and told them about the side effects and I was given a new medication.
It is helping me, and I feel like half myself again. No rib pain, just extremely exaughsted. Just typing this is exaughsting.
So, I had time today to ask GOD all about this venture and what it means and for whom. He talked about the Church Body. If you have Jesus as your personal saviour than we are all in one body; the Body of Christ Jesus.
Some have been hurt deeply by the Body of Christ.
There are 7 specific areas He told me about. I wont talk about them all but will mention some in this post.
- Past relationships
- Ways that people have treated you
- Being wrongly accused
- Pointing fingers
Look at those 7 things and see if any of them have happened to you in the Body of Christ?. Are you still hurt and have not been healed? Is it effecting you today? In this time of your life?
All this can happen in the Body of Christ because we are our own people and even though we should be better to communicate to our fella brothers and sisters in love and as Jesus did, we are still only human. We aren’t exempt from difficult things in life and how we react to them or handle them. We should communicate in a way that is honorable to God when relating to people, but because of each of our own pain and how we filter things in our minds because of that pain ; sometimes we react in a negative way for all. We have a self protection thing in us at all costs. Think about that.
Don’t listen to the lies the enemy is giving you. You know; ” oh look what she said about you, they don’t like you, he hasn’t dealt with that pain yet so he shouldn’t be in leadership, they don’t want you to know about this “… on and on you know .It is all lies, lies , lies and lies. ! Why do we even give it space in our existence? I don’t know! because we are human?.
These hurts and lies can be so debilitating ; just like when I couldn’t bend down to get dressed and I felt so vulnerable and useless. I think lies and hurts do that to us. Puts you in a place of pain. When your in pain you cant do anything without feeling that tug of pain and so we need to ask others to help us. We need to deal with it. Get rid of that pain , whether that is through prayer counseling, counseling, fasting; crying- yes crying. Did you know that Doctors say that tears help to heal our bodies and keep our body healthy? Crying reduces stress and improves our mood by 88.8%?.
As you go through this ; there will be healing as you open up the wounds of your heart in all honesty. Ask Jesus to come and heal your heart daily, I do. There may be some constipated responses but these things will get to be less and less bothersome as your heart is healed.
Rest in the WORD, worship in His presence.
During this week , I was going through this ; Sheldon woke up during the night at 3:15 two nights in a row and he felt that Matthew 3:15 was significant.
It says ” Jesus replied, “Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all righteousness.” Then John consented. ( NIV)
I take that as ; get right now get it done with all this junk and hurt and pain. Get right with God in your own heart. Don’t hold on to all the that hurt.
God has called you to do something for Him in this world, how can you do it fully with hurt; receiving and responding to ppl with a injured filtered mind?. How? Do you really want to live like this ?
As a Body of Christ let us remember the best example of all. Let us remember grace and love. We want unity in the Body of Christ so we can bring the harvest in. Think about that.
He is the air I breath, let Him breath LIFE in you and you breath His love to others in the Body of Christ.
Thanks for reading; I know it was long but it was important.